Tuesday, December 23, 2014

Multiple Personalities

I know that it has been months since I've posted on here. I'm letting that deter me. It was a busy year and I've little to show for it except my growing daughter, a few paintings and a book of journal entries an inch thick. If I were to say that I haven't learned anything during the year, I'd be lying. This year has taught me something about perseverance. I have a hard time sticking with things. I've short stories written but not revised, paintings painted but not displayed, things crocheted but not given to the people I wanted to give them to. So here I am with everything half done. I find myself wanting the life I have not yet strived for. So now, I am left with an overwhelming worry about what I will leave behind. All I can see is it will be a tub full of half written/painted/crocheted stuff.

I have friends that tell me, "Well you have a child. You work full time. Give yourself some credit." I very well could say all of these things. They are all true. If every woman said that, Toni Morrison wouldn't have become a Pulitzer Prize winning novelist. For a woman, having a child shouldn't be a crowning achievement nor should it be her only identity. I often find myself asking what am I? What is my identity? When I try to answer it I get so many personalities that I may as well be committed. I'm sure that I am not the only woman who feels this way.

So here's to a new year pregnant with the promise of follow through. I will be looking forward to finishing my stories and sending them out places. I have many ideas for more stories and paintings. 

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